Friday, April 22, 2011

The End is The Beginning–Or is it always continuous?

Good Friday just passed by and Easter weekend is coming on its way. And this marked the last day of Reading Week. From the KEVII graduation night till today, I admit, there are fluctuation of emotions and thoughts, coming to and fro, feeling my soul with so many things that I could not imagine. The last week of school was undoubtedly one which will make me remember school more. Not including the chance of me studying another degree, this will be my last week in my undergraduate life and I am glad to have experienced so much and these experiences had actually moulded part of me today.

That week added on with a certain importance as I was so lucky to listen to so many wise words, from teachers, seniors and even juniors. One professor shared his view on future after my oral examination, another talked to me while I visited his office on that same Thursday, another on the next day and as I started to tell others I am graduating, wise words came as well. I am so thankful to have all these. However, no matter how calm I am, how optimistic I am – mortals are still mortals. I still have to understand the fear of uncertainty when it comes to my future, especially a job. I am lucky to have settled a place to stay after graduation – that’s pretty an assurance of not sleeping on the street (although I had not excluded that possibility which I told one of the prof). However, a job – especially one that at least could allow me to embrace my knowledge – is what I needed now. Sometimes, you can’t control what you get is going to be what you want, but I am still hoping for the best – as I know I could not give up. In terms of whether things will turn out right, I believe it will. As one of the professor said, it’s me who will decide whether I will do what I wanted to do – the problem is whether it is possible to do it as planned. Yes, I wished to become a researcher, but I may need to persevere more, work harder, learn more and leave the rest to fate. At least, I am proud to have a dream which is not contaminated by greed or selfishness – I am proud as I have a dream to change the world, and make it a better place. At this time being, all the feelings a mortal shall feel: fear, worry, anxious – they exist in me, but I know I should not succumb to them. I should learn to embrace them and learn on my way to future. Just like what Papa and Mummy said, ‘If you want to be someone great, all these are small matters and you should learn how to overcome it. It’s a task for you.’

I am not sure if any of you have such a similar experience, but if you have, let’s stand up and work hard together. I am willing to take up these challenge and be a better human. These experiences are not really pleasant to heart, but it is something given by God or whatever Divine you believe in – as we know, good things do not usually comes in an obvious nice package – the key is us, to discover the good within all of them. I am sure I can do that and let’s hope for the best as we unravel our journey ahead…

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